underneath the stars
I shhhhhh...
that SOMEONE doesn't know
Hello visitors, i am Hong Kun and welcome to my world
after 5 month plus of struggling..i tink i have finally decided to put it to an end..im so tired..have u ever realise it? though i told you..bt ur reply is always "go slp lo"..
helping you find reasons to make myself continue to love you and treat you good..my friends called me stupid..bt i nv listen to them and i keep trying..thinking u might change one day..ended i was scolded for calling u too many times..u nv know how many stupid stuffs i did behind the screen..u din ask or felt them..have you ever asked "how was your day?", " r u tired?" izzit really so difficult to ask or to type??
the night get colds each day..at time i really wanted to cry bt i gotta cry so silently..put up strong front of everyone including you..u realize how tired and fatigue i am? do i have to freaking do and say everything out..tell u wat to do and wat to say??
i tried everything..i still cant compared to ur friends..whn ur wif ur friends i was either always at the back or at the front..do you like ever be by my side for some moments? u din..instead u asked me why not i talk to them? do you know how i felt and did u put urself in my shoes?
do i have to do bombastic things in order to touched u and to hear "i love u" and stuffs? even when u answer i duno as i asked u if u still love me or not..u know i really feel like hitting the wall..push u and force an answer out of u..bt i never..i keep telling its all my fault all these while and carry everything on my shoulder..i said sorry whn im not supposed to..is it all my fault tat lead to all thses?
if u ever msg me or reply in a nice tone will thing realli reach tis situation? i gave u wat u wanted..i changed..at least i tried to..bt did u? after 3 days things are back to the same..
msg and conversations decreased..till one day it hit 4 msg when we din meet..all less thn 5 words..do u knw how hurtful it is..here i am trying to salvage everything..bt..m i still demanding in this way? did u know how it felt each time u said i dunno..and how many times have u said it..u din know it..i really felt like i was on realized by you when u need me..though..u nv come n find me..im doing everything..AND I FREAKING MEANT EVERYTHING!!!
i wish..i hope..all this will really end here..amen..